I started writing today’s Monday Motivation this morning when a situation I’ve been coping with for the past few months flared up, and frankly, pissed me off. I was so angry and frustrated that I closed my computer – no longer in the peaceful headspace to write about positive perspectives. And another one bites the dust… As I started going about my morning, annoyed, tight jawed, and fueled by anger I realized – this might be exactly what I need to talk about. Since I began writing this earlier today, I have come into contact with several different people. Without being prompted, each of these people dove into conversation about something they’re really angry about. I realized I may not be alone in this feeling – I think a lot of us are angry right now. We’ve been coping with Covid and the upheaval of society for months now, and when you pile more heaviness of top of that, whether it’s a life change, tension in a relationship, a legal battle, financial strain, schools remaining closed, or even just being SO READY for a vacation that you can’t yet take – the cracks in our strength deepen, and we begin to break. For anyone who can relate to this feeling of heaviness, frustration, and even anger – I want to pause here and remind you that it’s okay to feel that way. It’s a part of the human experience. We don’t need to judge ourselves or anyone else for feeling this way – we simply need to acknowledge it, and start working our way out of it. Anger is one of those feelings we often want to numb; a fire that is so uncomfortable we start looking for a way out. The truth is, the only way out is through. Like any other uncomfortable emotion or chapter in our lives, we have to face it head on – sit with it, sort it out, try to learn from it, transmute its power, and begin climbing back up the emotional scale. The problem is it’s easy to stay in anger. It’s easy to let anger harden you, to want to say F the world, and isolate yourself from everyone and everything. It takes immense courage and strength to work through anger, and allow yourself to soften again – to be vulnerable, to be open, to love, or to trust again. I think about professional dancers – have you ever tried to do ANY of those moves? It is NOT easy! Moving with grace, looking soft and elegant as the body moves through difficult jumps, turns, and balancing requires immense strength and training. Our hearts and minds are no different. We have to actively choose to come back to the light, we have to actively practice forgiveness, we have to give ourselves permission and patience as we struggle and fall, we have to choose the pursuit of happiness over succumbing to the harshness of hardships over and over again. Some days that’s easier than others; some days a quick chat with a friend can help us diffuse those flames of anger, and others we spend the whole day in fuming. The point is to keep trying, to keep practicing, and to get stronger so that we can soften again. Just remember, your resilience is not shown in the walls you've put up, but in the ones you tear down. Your strength is not in the thickness of your skin, but in the openness of your heart. Now it's time to take a deep breath, offer ourselves some grace, and try to do better tomorrow...
With love and gratitude,