Trying to Fit In

A few weeks ago, I took my first yoga class in nearly a year. It was a family member’s birthday and several of us took the class together. A lot had changed since the last time I was in class and I was a little nervous about being able to keep up…

At one point the teacher led us into a posture that I used to be able to do, but quickly discovered that in the time since I’d last done yoga, I had lost that ability. I looked around the room and realized everyone else was sinking into it with relative ease.

Mortified at the idea of being the only one not able to do the posture, I attempted it again. It was a little complex and kind of intense, and I knew that if I pushed it and tried to force myself into it I’d very likely hurt something. So, I laid on my back and did a variation of the stretch that worked for my body.

I laid there looking up at the ceiling, feeling a bit embarrassed and my ego a little bruised when a thought came up – no one in that room was going to share my pain if I pushed it.

Fitting in was not worth the pain it would cost me.

I started thinking about how often in our lives we consider making decisions that might hurt us for the sake of saving face.

Sometimes we decide to go to college or not, to have children or not, to stay in a relationship or not, to take the job or not – even when it hurts us, just to avoid feeling different, alone, judged, or like we’ve failed.

I’ve written a lot about confidence and most of my coaching revolves around knowing, trusting, and remaining loyal to oneself – because I feel like so many circumstances in life tempt us away from it.

We all encounter numerous opportunities every day to choose to listen to that little voice inside of us, or to talk ourselves out of it. We so often allow our logical mind to take priority over our inner knowing, our divine guidance, or the inspiration of our muse.

That day on my yoga mat I listened to my body, to my inner knowing, that voice that said, ‘not yet.’

I might have felt like the outcast and a little embarrassed, but I did what I knew was best for me and that felt good.

It felt good to honor myself and to love myself enough to put feeling good above fitting in.

This week I invite you to remember your inner knowing, and to put it above all else. You can always talk yourself into or out of something, but what if you trusted your instincts instead? Even if it means risking being different or judged.

You might end up saving yourself some pain, or better yet, giving others permission to listen to themselves too.

Wishing you a wonderful week.

With love and gratitude,

Robin Ps - if this resonates with you, reach out to me and we can jump on a call! I'll give you some tools right away to help you start reconnecting with yourself and boosting your confidence.